Jeg blev ikke døbt som barn, jeg har aldrig troet på Gud og gået i kirke, og min søn skulle i hvert fald heller ikke døbes, da han var spæd for otteogtyve år siden. Men det ændrede sig for nogle år siden. Hvad der satte skub i en proces, der fik mig til at interessere mig for den kristne tro og kirken, kan jeg ikke længere huske, men jeg begyndte at komme af og til i en kirke tæt på mig og fatte sympati for en af præsterne. Og pludselig voksede det, så jeg fik den idé, at jeg ville døbes – i en alder af et par og halvtreds.
Det er nu fem år siden, den omtalte præst døbte mig ved en aftengudtjeneste, hvor kun min nærmeste familie og nogle få venner var til stede som mine pårørende. Jeg husker det som en smuk og stemningsfuld begivenhed.
Og jeg har ikke fortrudt. Siden er jeg kommet jævnligt i kirken, jeg møder faktisk helst til gudstjeneste hver søndag. Jeg vil gå så vidt som til at sige, at jeg er blevet kristen. Jeg synes, der er flere gode præster, og jeg får som regel noget med hjem, ligesom jeg elsker den store danske salmeskat og de mange fine ritualer.
Med min psykiske sygdom vil jeg sige, at det at lytte til – og synge – Guds ord, giver mig en særlig fred og ro. Der er på en måde en byrde, der bliver løftet fra ens skuldre, det giver harmoni og balance, den kristne tro og bibelens fortællinger giver mening og balance. Det skaber også eftertænksomhed og indsigt, synes jeg.
Samtidig har jeg fået øjnene op for andre positive sider ved den danske folkekirke. Da jeg for nogle år siden var i krise, opsøgte jeg den præst, der havde døbt mig og fik nogle samtaler hos ham, som faktisk var rigtig gode og nyttige. Kirken arrangerer også jævnligt foredrag, som jeg har deltaget i en del af, og som ofte er vældig spændende. Kirken gør en hel del.
Det er jo så en ret ny ting, at jeg er blevet døbt og kristen. Det er ikke noget, jeg pådutter andre, min søn er for eksempel ikke blevet omvendt, til gengæld er hans kæreste også kristen og holder af at gå i kirke, så det gør vi af og til sammen. Jeg har også et par andre stykker, jeg kan følges med, men ellers har jeg ikke noget imod at gå selv. Jeg skal lige have Guds ord med på vejen om søndagen. Så får jeg fred i sindet.
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